Keith Olbermann Ethers Hillary Clinton

It's about time. Keith's tirade at the end of his show was so well-written, so expertly composed and delivered, and most importantly, so true, that I'm not even going to attempt to speak on the subject. I wouldn't dare sully his speech by putting my (by comparison) poorly written opinion next to his. I will say this: His opinion, while I do agree with it, is extremely biased and really has no place in journalism. With that said, take a seat and grab some popcorn. You are about to see one of the most ruthlesss, brutal, and well-deserved ether-ings of all-time.

Worst list ever??!?!?!?!

I was browsing a forum that I frequent, and someone started a thread titled "Your Top 10 Superhero Movies." I don't have a Top-10 that I can immediately crank out, but I still went into the thread, not knowing what to expect. Maybe I was going to attempt to write a list, maybe I just wanted to see other peoples list. I was in for a shock. I've seen many list of the "top" something's of all-time: movies, albums, tv shows, etc. Upon entering this thread, however, I laid my eyes upon what might be the worst list ever created of anything...ever. lol This is the list made by the person who started the thread:

1-)Fantastic Four 1
2-)SpiderMan 3
3-)Batman Dark Knight
4-)Iron Man
5-)Ghost Rider
6-)Blade
7-)X Men 3
8-)Daredevil
9-)Incredible Hulk
10-)Superman Returns

This was my response:
"That just might possibly be the worst list of anything ever created. lol You have shitty moves in the list (Fantastic Four, Daredevil), movies that aren't out yet (Dark Knight), movies that are the worst out of their series (Spidey 3 and X-Men 3), and you left the best movies out of your list completely (X-Men 2 and Spider-Man 2). Wow. Just awful.

I don't know if I could rank a complete top 10 in order. It would take a lot of thought. But I know for a fact that there is a strong chance that none of the movies in your list would even make it into mine. lol Maybe since it's a top 10. But if it was a top 5, definitely not. The first two Spider-Man and X-Men >>> Your entire list. That's 4 right there."

That list had such a mind-blowing effect on me, that I had to write this blog and show it to others. Seriously, was that list even real? Was it meant to be a joke? Is that person retarded? Is he 12 yrs old? What sort of mental handicap could cause a person to make a list like that? I seriously can not say with any degree of certainty that any of the movies in his list would make it into mine if I made a list.

Let's give the list a closer look.

Fantastic Four, that movie just sucked. Plain and simple. There's not even really anything to discuss. How this could be his all-time favorite superhero movie boggles my mind.

Spider-Man 3, BY FAR the worst movie in the series. It wasn't a BAD movie, but the first two set such a high bar and were so much better. How is this even in his list, much less 2?

The Dark Knight, this isn't even out yet, and won't be for another 2 months. Huh?

Iron Man, this just came out this weekend. Shouldn't you need more than a day to fully absorb a movie to the point where it can be one of your all-time favs? Even if not, although this was a good movie, it's been incredibly over-hyped. When I compare it to what I feel to be the best superhero ever, it falls short in every way. What interests me the most about Iron Man is that the fact that it's got such a good reception from the common fan, yet is very similar to the first Hulk movie: Big on character and story, not so big on action. But nobody seemed to like the first Hulk movie. The fuck? Just goes to show you how powerful word of mouth is. If a lot of people say something is the shit, the average Joe will say it's the shit too, whether they truly enjoy or not, just so they don't appear to be going against common belief.

Ghost Rider, I didn't see this one, but I've heard nothing but average reviews. I've heard nobody who loved it, and I don't know anyone who hated it either.

Blade, this is the only one that might make my Top 10 list. And if it did, it would still be near the bottom, and I really liked this movie.

X-Men 3, once again the worst one its series. Better than Spider-Man 3, but still pales in comparison to the first two X movies. My problem with Spidey 3 and X3 making the list isn't so much the fact that they're on the list, but the fact that the first two movies in each series aren't.

Daredevil. Nuff said.

Incredible Hulk, as I mentioned earlier, this movie typically gets a poor reception from the common fan, so I'm surprised to see it on his list. Then again, why should I be? His list seems fully comprised of movies that people don't like. I personally don't understand everyone's gripe with this movie. Once again, I think it's just people being followers. The average fan came out saying this movie sucked (probably because it had some depth and wasn't completely full of mindless action), then everyone just followed suit so as not to appear different. I don't know if this would make my Top 10, probably not, but it doesn't deserve the bad rep that it gets.

Superman Returns, if you're gonna put a Superman movie in there, why not one of the originals? Once again, this wasn't bad, but I wasn't blown away by any means.

For me, a great superhero movie should have a lot of the same things that a great regular movie has: good characters, good story, good acting, and good character development and chemistry. Then, throw in some really cool action and special effects, and you've got yourself a winner. The movie that embodies these characteristics the most (Spider-Man 2), isn't even in this guy's list! Oh well, just thought I'd vent. Maybe I'll compose my list a little later.

Hillary Clinton: A Woman’s Guide to Destroying the Democratic Party

Hi, my name is Hillary Rodham-Clinton. We are facing a very important general election this November. The decisions we make in November can potentially impact this country for the next 8 years, and many more thereafter. As one of the leading candidates for President of the United States, it is my goal to make sure that our country continues to move in the right direction. By "right direction," I mean the wrong direction.

We have had 8 long and arduous years of President George W. Bush, but is 8 really enough? Despite the fact that our country is declining at an alarming rate, it could be much worse. That, my fellow citizens, is my goal: To make things worse. Though we can not keep President Bush in office, it is my goal to make sure that we elect someone who will continue his work.

As a true blue Democrat, I see no reason why we, the Democratic party, should come together for one common goal. Sure, we could unite as one party and do everything in our power to get a Democrat elected as the next President of the United States. But why be so short-sighted? Yes, that could help us NOW. We may be able to help restore the economy, get our troops out of Iraq, provide competitive health care, and eliminate tax cuts for the rich. But would it not be better to do just the opposite? If we elect John McCain, a man who I believe, unlike Senator Obama, is qualified to be Commander-In-Chief, we can continue going in the right direction. By "right direction," I mean the wrong direction.

Therefore, my fellow citizens, I am going to lay out my detailed plan to make sure that we elect John McCain the next President of the United States. That way, he can help the country continue to move in the right direction. By "right direction," I mean...well, you get the point.

People have said this country is not ready to have a female President. I am out to prove my critics right. The first step of my plan is to make sure that I embody every negative stereotype against women. I will cry at the drop of a hat. It shows I'm human, not that I'm emotional and will be unable to think logically and level-headed in a crisis.

I will think only of myself and no one else. That way, I can ignore what the people want and what is best for our country. I can be better able to further my own goals this way. Would Senator Obama be a good President? Who knows? Would he better than myself? Maybe. Would he better than President Bush? Absolutely! But that is not what's important. What IS important is that I make sure that everything that happens from this point out benefits me, and only me.

Mathematically, it is essentially impossible for me to overtake Senator Obama in overall votes or delegates. Though I can not win the Democratic nomination the "traditional" way, that is no reason for me to quit! I am not a quitter, and I will not quit on this country or my supporters until John McCain is President! I will drag Senator Obama's name through the mud. I will do everything in my power to make him appear unfit to be President. Through this strategy, I can make sure that John McCain becomes President in one of two ways. 1.) I can win the nomination by winning over the superdelegates. The voting Democrats will rebel, either by voting for McCain or not voting at all, since I won the nomination despite losing the overall vote. That happened to them before, and they hated that. 2.) Obama may still win the nomination, but I will have made him so look bad that McCain will beat him, despite Senator Obama previously being one of the most liked and inspirational candidates ever.

I will not know defeat. It is not in my nature. As a woman, I will do everything I can to embarrass strong, intelligent and logically-thinking women. I will make sure that, rather than gracefully accepting defeat and bowing out of the race admirably and uniting behind my fellow Democrat for the better of the country, I will trudge on until everything, including Senator Obama and the Democratic Party, is destroyed in my path. Then, when the dust has settled, and Senator McCain is the new President of the United States, I can rest. I can rest because I know that the country is finally heading in the right direction. By "right direction," I mean the wrong direction.

Thank you.

Again I say: Fuck Chauncey Billups.

He is the Pistons kryptonite. Not Rasheed. Ever since the 2004 championship, Chauncey has played arrogantly and carried himself with a cockyness that should be reserved for players like LeBron and Kobe. Last week, the Pistons held a 50th Anniversary ceremony at the Palace where the named the top 30 Pistons of all-time. After the players were named, a player from each era gave a speech: Dave Bing, Isiah Thomas, and Chauncey Billups. To make a long story short, the question of which team (the Bad Boys or the current Pistons) is better was raised. Chauncey had the nerve to say his team. Seriously? The Bad Boys would never allow a player like LeBron James to get to the hole at will. They would put him on his ass. The Bad Boys would never play down to their opponents level. The Bad Boys won when they were supposed to.

The current Pistons have won 50+ games 6 years in a row. They've made it to the Eastern Conference Finals 5 years in a row. All they have to show for all that regular season success is 1 championship and too many early playoff exits. 1 championship in 6 years, and this guy walks around with a swag that the San Antonio Spurs SHOULD have.

In all of our early playoff exits, he has played "questionably." He forces bad shots, hoping to draw a foul, then looks like an asshole when no contact is made. Why not just shoot the ball? He misses free throws down the stretch, something he never did in the "Mr Big Shot" days when the Pistons were still hungry for a title. He takes plays off. He misses layoffs. He makes uncharacteristic mistakes. Then, after it's all said and done. He walks around with a smug smile on his face and goes "We'll be all right."

Fuck that. As long as he's running the team now, we WON'T be all right. He doesn't care. He thinks that he, and the rest of this team, is so good that the championship should be handed to them every year. A truly great player would be ANGRY after losing to a team like Philly in the playoff home opener. He would be MAD that we've exited the playoffs early in the past 2 years and, as a true leader, would rally the troops and lead us back strong. He wouldn't merely shrug it off and go "We'll be fine." If the Lakers lost to a vastly inferior team, do you think Kobe would shrug it off? Can any of you ever hear Kobe going "We'll be fine" after a humiliating loss as if he doesn't care? I can't imagine it.

As far as I'm concerned, if we exit the playoffs any time before the NBA Finals, I want Billups out of here. He can take Rip with him too. Those two have let the comparison between them and Isiah/Joe D go to their heads. On their best day, they're not half the men, or players, that Isiah and Joe D are. They are no longer competitors. They are no longer hungry. No matter what Rasheed does, can you question his heart? He played hard from the opening tap in Game 1, then took responsibility for the loss because of one missed shot while Chauncey and Rip sat quietly after their piss-poor performances. If the Pistons don't win the next 4, they should be ashamed of themselves.

Martin Lawrence is the most over-rated comedic black actor EVER!!!!!

I can't hold this in any longer. It has to be said. I can't stand Martin Lawrence. I never have, and I never will. He is CONSISTENTLY unfunny, yet for some inexplicable reason, gets treated like a trail blazer for black comedians. Whenever Martin goes on a talk show, he is introduced as a "genius." "Genius" is not a word that should be thrown around lightly. Additionally, one should be extra careful when using it to describe a comedian. A comedic genius knows the subtle nuances that are necessary to draw laughs. He not only knows HOW to make people laugh, he knows WHY they laugh. He knows what is funny about himself, life, and the way in which we interact with one another, and is able to present it in a humorous fashion.

I was flipping through the channels recently and saw Martin, Mo'Nique, and Cedric the Entertainer on Oprah, promoting Martin's latest movie, "Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins." Mo'Nique and Oprah praised Martin as if he were to black comedy what GOD is to the Christians. I was disgusted. For some reason, it's become fashionable to praise him. Is it because of his longevity? Because he's been doing movies for almost 20 years now? Being able to still get work, especially when the work is deplorable, does not make you a genius. Why not just praise his longevity? Why fill his head with lies about how funny he is? What purpose does that serve? Are you going to ask him for money in the near future? You should just spare him (and me) the false flattery.

Of course, I would never go so far as to make such a bold assertion without providing some reasons and proof. So let's get down to the real meat and bones of this post. Let's talk about WHY I believe Martin is over-rated. As stated before, he gets the word "genius" thrown at him a lot. What makes someone a comedic genius? I believe consistency is the main factor. A comedic genius consistently does funny stand-ups. He consistently makes good movies (he may not have a flawless track record, but he is more often funny than not). Typically, anything he is affiliated with is funny.

Typically, anything Martin is affiliated with is loathsome. THE MAN HAS NEVER STARRED IN A FUNNY MOVIE. Point blank period. I know some of you have liked some of his movies. That's fine. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. I am about to go to IMDB and make a list of every movie Martin has starred in, or played a major role. If you can find CONSISTENT funnyness in this list, feel free to post a comment "correcting" me.

STARRING ROLES (in chronological order):
Bad Boys
A Thin Line Between Love and Hate
Nothing To Lose
Life
Blue Streak
Big Momma's House
What's The Worst That Could Happen?
Black Knight
National Security
Bad Boys 2
Rebound
Big Momma's House 2
Wild Hogs
Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins

Now keep in mind when viewing that list, that the Bad Boys movies aren't comedies. OK now…GO! Find consistency!! No…wait…I found consistency: Consistent SHITTYNESS. How could someone in their right mind call a man with that resume a "genius"? Now let's take a look at his supporting roles.

SUPPORTING ROLES (in chronological order):

Do The Right Thing
House Party
House Party 2
Boomerang

It seems to me that the only thing consistent about his resume is that, as long as he doesn't have a big role; you have a strong chance at making a good film. Are we redefining "genius" to describe someone who makes things better, the less they have to do with it? Can we make a graph? The less Martin is in a movie, the better the movie will be? Hell, let's try it and see! Martin played a HUGE role (no pun intended) in "Big Momma's House 2," and it sucked. Martin played absolutely no role whatsoever in the creation or filming of "Schindler's List," and it's one of the best movies of all-time! I knew it! PROOF! lol And these are the attributes of a genius?

Finally, let's take a look at Martin's most prized work, his TV show. "Martin" is probably the only positive thing that Mr. Lawrence has on his resume, and I would argue that show, too, is dramatically over-rated. I liked some of the characters he played, and I liked him roasting Pam, but overall, the show was quite average. By comparison, another show that ran at the same time was, in my opinion, MUCH funnier: The Fresh Prince of Bel Aire. I would compare the resumes of Martin and Will Smith, but I think I've already embarrassed Martin enough…and Will isn't even a primarily comedic actor. God forbid I compare Martin's work to that of true geniuses: Richard Pryor, Bill Cosby, Redd Foxx, or even Dave Chappelle and Chris Rock.

Martin has acted in approximately 20 movies in his career. He has done his own stand-up specials, hosted Def Comedy Jam, and had his own TV show. The best that can be said for him is that, when it's all said and done, his TV show will probably rank somewhere in the lower-middle of all-time funniest black shows beneath every show that came out in the 70's and 80's. lol I would list all the shows I think were better than his, but I have places to be today.

I am going to see "Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins" in about an hour and a half. I figure that, like nearly every other movie he's ever starred in, that it will be shitty. If it's not, I will hurry back to my computer and type up an apology for dogging a good movie before I saw it. However, it's only going to cost me $3.25 to see it, and I will probably still feel cheated. And this is the man we call a genius?

The Top Movies of 2007!!! FINALLY!!

The Top Movies of 2007!!! FINALLY!!

It is finally here! We are at the end of January, and I have finally come around to composing my list of the top movies of 2007. Why did it take so long, you ask? Well, for one, I am very lazy. I'm also a huge procrastinator. Most importantly, though, I took so long because 2007 was so jam-packed full of outstanding films! As most film enthusiasts know, in December of every year, the best films are released in a few major cities in order to be eligible to contend for that year's awards. Then, in January, those films will get their wide release. So during January, I spent a lot of time catching up on those films, as well as making use of my new DVD burner and burning copies of … well … everything.

Another bonus about December is that films released during that time often have what we call in the pirating world, DVD screeners, released for them. A DVD screener is basically a DVD of a film that is created for those who dole out awards, that way; they can watch the flick at home rather than going to the theater. This saves me (the bootlegger) money as well. I "acquire" a copy of the screener and make my own DVD of it. In January, at some point every week, I was about to start writing this blog. Then another DVD screener would come out of a movie I wanted to see, thus pushing back the creation of this blog. Now that I have pretty much viewed everything I wanted to see (I still haven't got the opportunity to watch Sweeney Todd, even though I do own a DVD screener of it), I am ready to compose this review.

Now, one final note before I begin. This list is not a list of the "best" movies. It is a list of my FAVORITE movies. It is a list which combines excellent filmmaking with overall "enjoyability." That means that there may be a film … let's say at 15 … that is a "better" film than the movie occupying the 12^th slot. The 15 film may have far superior acting, cinematography, story, etc. than the 12 film. I just probably enjoyed the 12 film more, while it still did a good job of those same things as well.

So without further "Apu," let's get started! Oh yeah…did I mention it's a top 20? :)

20. "Shoot 'Em Up"

"Shoot 'Em Up," for some reason, got a really bad rap. I think it is because the critics took it too seriously. This film is not meant to be taken seriously. The dialogue is intentionally corny. The action is intentionally ludicrous. If you can understand that, then this flick was one helluva ride. It's very similar to "Grindhouse" in the sense that it's "bad" on purpose….and it's badness is done so well, that it's good! The corny dialogue was hilarious, and the action scenes were just plain awesome. It's a great "popcorn flick" and definitely something you watch when you just want to have a good time.

19. "TMNT"

This movie made the list because it helped me re-live my childhood. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were my favorite cartoon growing up, and the dark tone of the comic books was amazing. I didn't know what to expect from this movie going in, but not only did it retain the darkness of the comic books, it featured a moment that true TMNT fans have visually been waiting on for decades. Without that scene, this movie may not have made the list. That scene, for me, was similar to how I felt right before I saw Yoda fight in Star Wars. As I saw Yoda's shadow approaching and realized what was about to go down, I thought "OH MY GOD!! AM I ABOUT TO SEE WHAT I THINK I'M GOING TO SEE?!?!" That is the exact same feeling I had about the aforementioned scene in this movie. The lead-up to the scene was awesome, and it fulfilled everything I could have hoped or wanted. I felt like a happy kid again.

18. "30 Days Of Night"

This movie reinvented the vampire genre for me. I haven't seen a vampire movie I've REALLY liked since the original "Blade." The concept was great, and this movie was just wonderfully shot. Although it still featured some of those "Why the hell would you do something like that?" stupid horror movie moments, it featured far less of them than your typical horror flick. It was smart, entertaining, dark, and seemed far more real than the average vampire movie. Another reason this movie made the list was because it surprised me. I didn't think it would be as good as it was. Shock value is always a way to get on my good side.

17. "The Simpsons Movie"

Ah yes…my movie that was 18 years in the making. Everyone who knows me knows me as the biggest Simpsons (and Pistons) fan alive. I was worried going into this film because The Simpsons has been on such a downfall over the past few seasons … though it has been MUCH MUCH better this season. I felt this was a film that should have been made a good 8 years ago, when the show was in its prime. So I was worried that a movie I had wanted for so long would be as much of a disappointment as the past few seasons. I was wrong. Would it have been better 8 years ago? Yeah, probably, but it was still REALLY good and funny as hell. Unfortunately, there was one animated movie that was better.

16 "Ratatouille"

It's Pixar. 'Nuff said.

15. "Juno"

Oh how the critics love this movie! I was a little disappointed when I saw it because, as much as the critics hyped it up, it wasn't nearly as great as they made it out to be. Upon reflection, however, it still was an awesome movie. Maybe it's because I got a kid on the way, I don't know. But it really hit home with me at times. In addition to being really funny (though I thought the dialogue was a little TOO snappy and clever coming from teenagers, which bordered on unrealistic since I can't see ANY teenager being THAT witty), Ellen Page OWNED that role and she deserves the Oscar nomination she got.

14. "Eastern Promises"

This is yet another Cronenberg masterpiece. David Cronenberg is fattening his resume at an alarming rate. A dark and evil Russian gangster movie, this film is carried by its two outstanding (and still under-rated) leads, Naomi Watts and Viggo Mortenson. Viggo got an Oscar nomination for his role in this film.

13. "Superbad"

Anything having anything to do with Seth Rogen or Jonah Hill seems to be money right about now. Although Seth played one of the supporting roles in this movie, his hand in the film can be felt throughout. This movie is flat out funny, and although not as funny or clever to me as Seth's "other" film this year, it was still awesome. I think this movie hit home for a lot of people because the humor was a lot easier to understand. "Knocked Up" and "The 40 Yr Old Virgin" were a lot more dialogue-driven, with clever and snappy jokes and a lot of pop-culture references. If you don't know who these people are that the jokes are referring to, they won't be funny to you. "Superbad" featured less of those sorts of pop-culture, so it appealed more to a wider audience. It was still funny as hell though, which is why it's on the list!

12. "We Own the Night"

This is probably the most slept-on film of the year to me. For some reason, nobody saw this movie, and I really liked it. I was drawn to it at first by the A-list actors involved: Joaquin Phoenix, Mark Wahlberg, and the great Robert Duvall. How could you not be interested in a film with that kind of talent?!?! Awesome acting aside, which was a given, the story was really engaging. Duvall and Wahlberg play Chief and Captain of police, respectively. They are also father and son. Phoenix plays a nightclub manager who deals with all kinds of seedy and shifty characters that Duvall and Wahlberg would love to get their hands on. Unbeknownst to all of Phoenix's shady friends, he is also the brother and son of Wahlberg and Duvall's characters, respectively. Without giving up too much of the plot away, Phoenix's character ends up in an "awkward" situation, to say the least, between his gangster friends who don't know he is related to the cops, and his family.

11. "Grindhouse"

It takes a special kind of filmgoer to appreciate a film like "Grindhouse," and that sort of person is exactly who Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino had in mind when they made the film. Well, it was either that person or themselves. Either way, "Grindhouse" was a hell of an experience. "Planet Terror," similar to "Shoot 'Em Up" is intentionally bad, to remind us of those old B-movies that used to show at the grindhouse, 2 for the price of 1. Of course, I was not around for those movies at the times they were showing, but I've seen my fair share. "Planet Terror" is not meant to be taken seriously, it's just meant to be fun, and it is. "Death Proof" completely flips the script and gives us a tense, dialogue-driven film as only QT can do it. Culminating in an awesome car chase, Quentin shows us why he is one of the best directors alive right now.

10. "There Will Be Blood"

Another film that is in most critics' top 3, it is without a doubt deserving of all its accolades. This is a powerful film that delivers the acting performance of Daniel Day Lewis' career…and that is saying a lot. DDL is probably the most underrated actor alive today. Everyone knows he is great, yet he fails to get the respect and admiration that is showered upon his peers (pretty much his only two peers, Al Pacino and Robert De'Niro). The only reason this film is not higher on my list is because I had 9 films that I ENJOYED more. This film did have some lulls, and it's not the most riveting story ever created, but it is a masterpiece nonetheless.

9. "3:10 To Yuma"
This modern-day western was slept-on a bit when it was released. I have to admit, that I didn't even see it until it came out on DVD, and I had great interest in it when it came out. It was well worth wait the wait. This was a great, great movie and hopefully can help bring back the western. There were great performances throughout as well, from Ben Foster, Russell Crowe and Christian Bale.

8. "American Gangster"

This was just a cool flick. I think I was more awe-struck at the great set-up that Frank Lucas had. I was literally upset that he got caught. He had such a sweet deal going. I wouldn't dick-ride him enough to make an album about him and shout out his name like a wannabe thug…but that's another story. Denzel, as usual, really carried the film, but the entire supporting cast did an excellent job. Russell Crowe, yet again, had another outstanding year in which he was essentially looked over. He is another actor who is continuously slept-on, but that too is another story.

7. "The Kingdom"

A riveting, action-packed thriller is a really good way to describe "The Kingdom." However, it leaves out the fact that it speaks a great deal about foreign relations in this country, post-9/11. I love movies that do a great job of combining a message, with action. Those of us who only appreciate action, have a great time. Those of us who can sift through the action to get the message, can appreciate both. Although there were a lot of films released this year that dealt with terrorism, "The Kingdom," I felt, did the best job of combining the message with great story-telling, acting, and action…which is the one thing that was absent in the other two political thrillers released this year. Now of course, action is not mandatory by any means, but if all three movies have great stories and acting, and one of them also has great action, that would make the one with action a little better, right?

6. "Transformers"
YEAH!! What is there to say about "Transformers" that hasn't already been said? If you didn't grow up in the 80's, you probably didn't like this film as much as those of us who did, but this movie was THE SHIT! This is a prime example of how my list is composed. Is "Transformers" better than "There Will Be Blood"? Of course not! Did I enjoy "Transformers" more? Hell yeah! Ground-breaking special effects, seeing my all-time favorite cartoon character in real life, incredible action sequences...as bad as this movie could have been, it was better than I could have imagined. This movie had the same effect on me as "TMNT," just more powerfully. While "TMNT" was my favorite show, Optimus Prime was my favorite character. I ADORED Optimus Prime. So to have him back was awesome enough. But I can't recall the last time I watched a movie with my mouth hanging open the entire time. This movie was AMAZING to watch. I can't wait for the sequel.

5. "Zodiac"

Without a doubt, THE most slept-on film of 2007. While receiving numerous 4-star reviews, it has garnered few, if any, award nominations, which is a horrible shame and a travesty. This was an EXCELLENT film. The acting was phenomenal, and despite being a lengthy 160 mins, did not seem to drag on to me. It was more of a detective movie than a thriller or a horror movie, but David Fincher, Director of "Se7en," did an excellent job of meshing the detective aspects of the movie with the thriller aspects. He also did a great job of making the killings seem real, and not "movie real," if that makes sense. You felt like you were seriously seeing someone get stabbed, not someone getting stabbed in a movie. I essentially found no flaws with this flaws with this film, and it's a shame that it hasn't got the recognition it deserves.

4. "Knocked Up"
The funniest film of the year, hands down. As I mentioned earlier, "Superbad" seems to get a lot more of the accolades, but I think that's because the humor in "Knocked Up" is not for your average filmgoer. There are a lot of subtle things that the average person may take for granted, as well as a lot of obscure references of which they may not be aware. "Knocked Up," with it's clever and witty dialogue, and a story that any man or woman can relate to, takes the 4 spot with no regret or second thoughts on my part. I can watch this movie over and over and it never gets any less funny. At the same time, I can appreciate the story as well, and enjoyed seeing the main characters go from where they were at the beginning, to where they ended up. I think this will probably go down, along with "The 40 Yr Old Virgin" as one of the all-time greats.

3. "Sicko"
I haven't seen a movie in a long time that made me feel this "sicko" after seeing it. Michael Moore's latest documentary was flat-out disturbing. "Sicko" is about the health care situation in our country. It shows that, not only is our health care system poor, not only are we getting ripped off, but MANY countries (even ones we consider to be "inferior" to us) have much BETTER health care systems. Also, it shows us how the media manipulates us into THINKING that our system is good and that everyone else's stinks. I had no idea that many other countries had free universal health care before I saw this film. I had no idea that the things I just assume to be "the way it is," are not that way in other countries. In many ways, I consider myself to be very knowledgeable about the differences between the U.S. and other countries, but I was in the dark when it came to the differences in health care. And like someone who finds out that something they've always believed to be true, is false … I was not ready learn the things I learned while watching this film. "Sicko" is this high on my list strictly due to the profound impact it had on me emotionally. I was ANGRY after seeing this film. I did not want to live in this country anymore (I still don't). And I became more passionate about politics than I ever was (and I'm much more passionate than the average person). This is definitely a film that EVERYONE owes it to themselves to see.

2. "300"

I bet you thought I forgot about this, didn't you? No sir! What can I say about "300" that hasn't already been said? Is there even anybody who hasn't already seen this movie who I need to convince to check it out? I doubt it. You've all seen it. You all know it's the shit and why. Never has the story of the Spartans been so beautifully told. Watching "300" was like watching a live action comic book, complete with action and violence that can only be seen in comic books. And if any of you guys watched this movie and were not inspired to work out for at least a week, I don't know what's wrong with you.

1. "No Country For Old Men."
Flawless. That is the best and only word that can be used to describe this movie. Flawless. Rarely have I seen a movie that I have absolutely no complaints about. There is no way this movie could be any better than it was. If the ending, which so many people have complained about, was different, it would lose its unconventional style and originality. It would become "just another great movie." "No Country for Old Men" is not just a great movie. It is an immaculate movie. This is not just the best film this year, this is the best film to come out in SEVERAL years. Acting? Flawless. Javier Bardem gives the 2^nd best performance of the year, and by far the best performance in a supporting role. Bardem's performance was so phenomenal, that it took the attention away from Josh Brolin's outstanding performance as well, which, if there were room, should have received an Oscar nomination as well. I could go on forever about what is "right" about this movie, because everything is "right" about it. It's easier to talk about what is wrong with it: Nothing. The Coen brothers have made their best film, topping their previous best, "Fargo," and probably have reached their peak. If this film does not win the Academy Award for Best Picture, it would be the biggest mistake in the Academy's history.

Finally, I would like to briefly talk about some pf the noticeable absences from the list. First, as I mentioned earlier, I have not yet watched "Sweeney Todd." I didn't bother to watch it before making this list because, despite being a huge fan of Johnny Depp and Tim Burton, I am equally NOT as big of a fan of musicals. So I highly doubt this film could crack my list. If I watch it and it does, rest assured I will write an apology in this blog later. "Atonement," the most noticeable film missing from my list, is missing by design. I think it is HORRIBLY overrated. While beautifully shot and acted, it is a love story. As a love story, they spent very little time establishing the romance between the two leads, and more time building up to the "event" that movie is based upon. Therefore, after the event took place, at about the halfway point, and it caused the two leads to separate, I didn't care anymore. I didn't care about the characters and whether or not they got back together. So as a love story, it didn't work for me. And I am not one who is opposed to love stories…I liked "The Notebook." lol Finally, "The Assassination of Jesse James By the Coward Robert Ford" is not on the list simply because it is too fresh in my mind and I want to watch it again before I give a final take on it. It was an EXCELLENT film however and I would recommend it to everyone, I just need to watch it again for a number of reasons before I can decide how I feel about it and place it firmly on the list. I can say with a large degree of certainty that, had I been able to watch it again before writing this, that it would have made the list.

2007 was a great year for movies, one of the best in a long time. Hopefully 2008 will be just as good.
RIP Heath Ledger, hopefully The Dark Knight will help your legacy live on.

I Think Chauncey Billups May Be Throwing Games

I have been holding off on writing this blog for quite some time. I did not want to believe it. It's not because I'm some sort of huge Chauncey Billups fan. Players come and go. He's not my favorite player on the team, and he never was. I just didn't want to believe that someone on MY team could be capable of such a grievous atrocity. That is a crime for which beheading is the only adequate punishment. I have had several instances in the past in which I suspected that Chauncey may be fucking up on purpose, but I intentionally let it go. I was beginning to forget about all the things he had done in the past that bothered me, and I was ready to put it behind me…then came last Saturday night.

The Pistons were on top of the NBA. Boston had a better record, but everyone knew who the better team was. We had beaten Boston on their own floor, Boston's 3^rd loss of the season, and neither team had lost since. The Pistons were favored to win this game, and they should have. Much more importantly, however, they COULD have. But I will come back to the Boston game later. First, let us go back to last years Eastern Conference Finals versus the Cleveland Cavaliers.

In what turned out to be the final game, there was a crucial play that essentially helped me make up my mind that Chauncey was throwing the series. He had done several questionable things up to this point, but on a particularly vital play at the end of the game, his fucking up went to whole new levels. He got the ball at the top of the 3-point line for a wide open three. He passed up the open 3 (how often does he do that?), drove down the lane, and then passed up another open shot. He then made the cardinal mistake of jumping up in the air with no place to go (and no real reason for doing it) then passed the ball directly to Drew Gooden as if he were wearing a Pistons jersey. Then, to top it all off, Gooden, just happy to have the ball, actually turned in the OPPOSITE direction of Cleveland's basket just to make sure he could secure the ball and the possession. Then, for no reason, Chauncey fouled him while we were in the penalty, sending him to the line, when a foul was not necessary. Finally, to seal the deal with Satan, he laughed. What the fuck was so goddamn funny? We were about to be knocked out of the playoffs by a DRASTICALLY inferior team, it was all his fault, and he somehow found reason to smile. Rasheed should have left him where he stood.

Fast forward to last Saturday, Jan. 5^th, 2008 versus Boston at the Palace. The Pistons were up by 3 entering the 4^th quarter, Chauncey's sins of last season long forgotten. Midway through the quarter, Boston tied the game, and eventually took the lead. With the Pistons still down by a respectable margin, no more than two possessions, Chauncey decided he wanted to "take over." After several poorly run plays, resulting in no points, Chauncey decided he would take the game into his own hands, forcing several bad shots against multiple Boston defenders. After missing two free throws, and a three-pointer, Chauncey was not finished throwing the game. With the Pistons still only down by 4, with just under 1 minute left, Chauncey was going to the line. He made his first free throw, and then missed the second. Before we continue, I would just like to point out that, going into the 4^th quarter, Chauncey was 5-5 from the line with 16 points on 4-9 shooting. So anyway, after Chauncey missed his second free throw, now making him 1-4 from the line in the past 2 minutes, he took the ball back behind the 3-pt line, as if playing street ball. Rather than running a good play, or doing anything even remotely smart, he cleared the court as if he was going to take his defender one-on-one, then forced a 3 with a hand in his face, which he air-balled. 0-3 in the 4^th quarter, all from behind the 3-pt line. 1-4 from the free throw line. As the buzzer sounded on the Pistons loss, Chauncey, with a smile on his face yet again after SOLELY costing the Pistons game, congratulates KG with a tap on the back. Sound familiar?

Let us not forget these other interesting notes. During LeBron's breakout Game 5, Chauncey, pretending to be some sort of hero, asked Flip to guard LeBron, then proceeded to get embarrassed. Why the hell would he even entertain the idea of guarding LeBron James? Does he not know that Tayshaun Prince is FAR superior to anyone on the team, and most players in the league, when it comes to guarding players like LeBron, T-Mac, and Kobe? Rasheed and Rip were both visibly pissed after the series, and even Lindsey Hunter was heard to remake "Something ain't right."

So after Saturday's performance in Boston, I would like to officially state that I am now of the opinion that Chauncey Billups is throwing games. All I can really do is hope that the ultimate goal is still to win the championship and that he is only throwing insignificant games for an extra piece of change right now.

The Use of the N-Word

The Use of the N-Word

I think it is about time that we laid out specific ground rules about the use of the dreaded "n-word." Things have spiraled out of control. White people have become much more comfortable with using the word. Black people are starting to revert back to the way they acted when the word was accepted. People of other races (other than black) are using the word too freely, simply because they work with, or are targeting their music toward, black people. The situation has gotten so out of hand that I think it's about time we decided, once and for all, who can use the word, who can not, and iron out definitions of its different variations.

The issue of the word's usage among non-black ethnicities quickly went from "barely noticeable" to "Is anyone else noticing this?" It got a little attention when Jennifer Lopez said it a few years ago, but then it sort of died down. I started to notice it when I realized that Fat Joe, a Latin-American, was saying it all the time in his raps. "Am I the only one that thinks this is a little odd?" Does Fat Joe get a "pass" because he raps? More importantly, SHOULD Fat Joe get a "pass" because he raps? Did he grow up in the hood? Was he in a gang? If the answer to both of those questions is "yes," I still say that "no," he should not get a pass. We have to draw the line somewhere, don't we? I guess I can let that go, though. I mean, Latin people do have a certain amount of credibility among blacks. So if Fat Joe can say it, where do we draw the line? What if an Arab person said it? Oh wait! There IS an Arab person who publicly says it all the time! DJ Khaled! That's right!

Come on now, black people. Seriously, an Arab person? This is OK now? Black people and Arab people have been at odds ever since the two bumped heads in one of black peoples most frequented places: the liquor store. I have nothing against Arab people myself, but in general, black people and Arab people have never really gotten along. Blacks don't like the fact that they can't buy anything in the hood from a fellow black person, it seems the Arab people own everything. Then, despite the fact that they make so much money from us, they still won't let us date their daughters! Then on top of all that, their men will consistently pursue our women! The relationship between blacks and Arabs has not been a match made in heaven.

So why are we letting DJ Khaled shout the n-word all over his CD? Why is he getting a pass? Because he affiliates himself with rappers? Then I think that, once again, the problem of the word's usage falls on the shoulders of rappers. At first, the fact that rappers were saying it all was a problem. Then that gradually became accepted. Rappers are going to say it, blacks are going to say it, that is not going to change. Now the problem is that rappers are allowing their peers to say it, peers who, were they not rappers, would get chin-checked if they said it. Why aren't DJ Khaled's peers going "Hey man, you're OK an all, but you can't go around saying that word."? Why are they allowing him to say it? And now that he does say it, and it's on records that are played on the radio, why are we, the consumer, allowing it?

We have to draw the line somewhere, and I'm ready to start now.

RULE 1: Blacks are allowed to say it. Should we be saying it? No. Is it confusing to other races that we say it so often among each other and to other races? Yes. The fact still remains, however, that we have earned the right to say it. It is part of our lexicon, and we never use it in a derogatory way. I am, of course, referring to "nigga." "Nigger," is not to be used by anyone, and we rarely use it ourselves. "Nigga," for the most part, is a term of endearment AMONG BLACKS. "That's my nigga." At worst, it is simply used to refer to another person. "Who's that nigga?" "Tell that nigga to watch where he's going." It's just black peoples way of saying "person."

RULE 2: NOBODY ELSE CAN SAY IT. Not Mexicans, not Puerto-Ricans, not Arabs, not Chinese, not Japanese. Nobody. End of discussion. If we can all live by, and respect, these rules, race relations should immediately improve.

If I could do it all over again...

How many of us in this world are doing exactly what we want to do with our lives? Are you working that dream job? The job that you said you wanted when you were asked what you wanted to be when you grew up? Are you happy with your position in life and how far you've come thus far? I figure that very few of us are. Have you ever wondered why you are not where you want to be in life?

I have. I wonder it all the time. Where did I go wrong? I have so much potential. I have the intellect, the skills, and the personality, to do whatever I want in life. How come I'm stuck at a meaningless job that I loathe, and see people with half my potential smiling from ear to ear? How come I see black guys, in the streets of Detroit, driving $50,000 cars, who look like the only thing they excel at is peddling drugs? Well, I know why in that case, and I also know that they are destined for death or prison and will probably never reach Scarface levels of success. However, I still compare them to myself. These guys have no skills or intelligence whatsoever (although they may have street smarts, which are more valuable than one may think), yet they enjoy the sorts of things in life of which I can only dream. Why is this? Motivation.

These guys saw that they had nothing going for themselves. They probably dropped out of high-school, or at best, received a poor education. They probably grew up destitute, lower than middle-class, struggling to do the sorts of things that I took for granted... like eat. They grew up living this hard life and wanted a way out. Did they choose the right way? No, probably not. Did they choose the best way for them? Maybe so. What can not be argued, however, is that they chose a path and went after it. They said to themselves, "I want the best out of life. I want the big car. I want the expensive cars. I want the fast women." Then they went out and got it. Did they use the most wholesome methods? No, but they made a choice. They made a conscious decision. They decided what they wanted in life, and they went and got it. That is far more than can be said for me.

At what point did I come to the fork in the road and take the wrong path? Did I even take the wrong path? I'm still not quite sure. I do know, however, that my fork came around the time I was about to graduate from high-school. When I was a kid, I was destined for success. I was grown beyond my years. I was breezing through school, at least academically. I did have a tendency to "act out." I knew at a young age that, even though I did not know anything about "majors" and "careers," that I want to go to the University of Michigan after I graduated from high-school. I knew this before I had even entered middle-school. Once I got to high-school, I remained focused, and for the most, had not strayed from that path. Once I became a senior, however, I began to slack off. I skipped class. I didn't do homework. We only needed 3 years of math to graduate, so essentially, I could fail whatever math class I took my senior year and still graduate, and that's what I did. Ironically, I am exceptional at math and great with numbers. So that should give you an idea of the effort I had to put in to fail this class. I don't remember if I actually failed the class or if I got a D, but the damage was done. My GPA was too low for U of M, or even MSU. My test scores were phenomenal, far above MSU's standards. My GPA, however, was .1 below their standard, and because of this, I was not accepted.

Entering college at Wayne State, I was faced with yet another "fork." Do I want to proceed with a major that will lead to a job I enjoy, but that is not lucrative? Or do I want to choose a major that will lead to a well-paying job? I chose the former. As a fresh-faced and hopeful 18 year old with no responsibilities and my whole life ahead of me, this seemed like the correct decision. Now, a 26 year old adult with thousands of dollars of debt, a degree (which I technically do not have yet due to, you guessed it, money that I owe) that will lead to a job that pays less than my current one, I have to wonder if I made the right choice. The economy is horrible. Jobs are few and far between. I am living in an age (or at least a place) where a degree, of any kind, does anything but guarantee you a job. I think I chose the wrong side of the fork.

Browsing through job openings on careerbuilder.com, I see jobs that ask for candidates with a degree in a particular field, as well as x amount of years experience in that field as well…yet another fork in which I chose the wrong direction. I've realized that you can choose one of two paths upon entering the job market. You can choose a more retail/sales based path, in which you will work more with people, and will gain customer service experience. Or, you can choose a more labor-intensive path in which you may not have to work with people, but you will have to punish your body doing thankless physical labor. I chose the latter. Now, at 26, I realize that that path is for people who have no skills other than the body parts with which they born. Those people will never be able to do anything other than that. They are frequently uneducated, and are destined for a life of mediocrity. At the age of 18, I incorrectly chose to lump myself in with them. Now I have 8 years of job experience doing worthless work that anybody with all 4 of their extremities can do. If I had chosen the other path, yes, I may have started out making less money and would have had to deal with angry customers, all while keeping a smile plastered across my face. But I could have used my intelligence, personality, skills and hard work to move up in life or in that industry. Right now, I couldn't get a lousy $8/hr office job due to my 0 years experience in the field. Essentially, even though those jobs start off paying a lot less, there is so much more room for growth and advancement. With a physical labor job, you may start at $14-$15/hr and quickly (within the next 2 years or so) move up to $18-$20/hr, but that is all you will ever do with your life. If your dreams consist of "being able to live comfortably," then that is the path for you. If you want more out of your life, if you are capable of doing more with your life, if you want to have even the slightest chance of enjoying your job…you may want to do something else.

I suppose that, at this point, you are probably wondering where I am going with this. Well, I'm not quite sure myself. I'm still in the process of trying to figure out how to remedy my situation. I think it revolves around a process of trying to figure out what I'm good at, figuring out a logical end, then achieving that end. Before I can do any of that, however, I have to have motivation. I have that motivation now: my son. When I was by myself and only had to worry about me, my problems were my problems. Now, with a girlfriend of nearly 3 years and a son on the way, my problems are no longer solely my problems. My problems are her problems. They will soon be my son's problems. I have to get my life together and be happy with myself and my life so that I can be a good man for her and a good father for him. I have to know what I am going to tell him when he reaches his forks. I have to make a decision now, now that I have yet again arrived at another fork. I do know one thing for sure. If I could do it all over again, when I reached my forks, I would not have been so careless about which path I took. I will tell my son not to be as short-sighted as I was, and to look ahead and think about what will benefit him the most in the long run. If I could do it all over again, I would have set a better example for him to follow.

Are we REALLY ready for a female president?!? LOL!!

Teary-Eyed Clinton Vows to Fight On

Reuters

Posted: 2008-01-07 17:16:44

Filed Under: Elections News

PORTSMOUTH, New Hampshire (Jan. 7) - A teary-eyed Hillary Clinton pushed for support on Monday as polls showed her poised for a huge New Hampshire loss to Democratic rival Barack Obama, but the former front-runner vowed to carry on with her presidential quest even if she loses.

Obama warned supporters against overconfidence as a flood of new polls gave him a double-digit lead over Clinton one day before the state casts the next votes in the race for the White House.

At a campaign event in Portsmouth, Clinton choked up and grew uncharacteristically emotional as she talked about her reasons for seeking the presidency in the November election.

"Some of us put ourselves out there and do this," she said, her voice breaking and her eyes glistening with tears, "against some pretty difficult odds and we do it each one of us because we care about our country."



OK now, seriously, I try not to be sexist. I really do...but straight up?!?!??! LOL!!! This is just BEGGING to be commented on. Crying already? Before the 2nd major PRIMARY!??! Of all the things she could have done to lose credibility as a SERIOUS female contender for President, this has to be at the top of the list. One of the major knocks against women in general is that they are overly emotional. If one hopes to be the leader of our country, they need to be strong and confident and not show weakness. If she's crying already, over this, how are we going to expect her to fare when things are REALLY difficult? IF I were a Hillary supporter, I'd be pretty disappointed right now. Shit, if I were a woman, I'd be pretty disappointed right now. Fortunately for me, since I am neither a Hillary supporter, nor a woman, I'm just finding this side-achingly amusing. :)