I Needed This Day So Bad

Those of you who read the blog that I wrote just last night are aware of how discouraged I am right now. I'm not enjoying myself in Bakersfield at all, and I was very depressed last night because I saw no light at the end of the tunnel. After writing that blog, I made up my mind that I was going to go spend the day in LA today. I asked Raena if she wanted to go, and she said no. I didn't care. I was going to go regardless. I'd take Michael with me if I had to, and she could have the house to herself for the day. But I needed to do something for me, and I was going to do it and nothing was going to stop me. I had to find SOME way to cheer myself up.

When she woke up this morning, Raena, still seemingly in a poor mood, said that she had changed her mind and was down with going to LA if I wanted to. That was fine with me. She could come if she want. If she did have an attitude, I was not going to allow it to bring me down and ruin my day. I had too much riding on it. I had reached my lowest point. I had to find a way to pick myself up. So, after packing up every thing we would need, we headed toward Los Angeles at about 11:45 am. I can say in all honesty that not only was today the best day I've had since I left Detroit, it was one of the best days I've had in YEARS.

I had a friend who lived in Hollywood, Jeremy. He said he was free for part of the day and would be cool with meeting up with me and showing me around a bit. I headed straight for Hollywood, specifically, Hollywood Blvd. Now, I have been to LA and Hollywood before. I was young at the time, but old enough to remember it. However, you all must keep in mind that this is the life I always envisioned for myself. As a kid, I was too young to appreciate it. After years of studying film, Hollywood, TV, and music...I knew this was what I wanted. I still don't know in what capacity, but I know now for sure that is the life for me. It was magical. As you can see in the pictures I uploaded, I got to walk around and take pictures of places I have always dreamed of being. I got to walk along the walk of fame and snap pictures of the stars on the ground that represented all the greats.I got to see the Kodak Theater and the Chinese Theater. I got to go in a ton of cool gift shops and get some great souvenirs. Basically, I got to spend my day taking in every bit of the atmosphere that I one day hope to immerse myself in. It was everything I've ever wanted and dreamed of.

Everything just seemed to go right today. In my previous blog, I had talked about how I was discouraged because I couldn't go to LA because our car seemed to struggle to get through the hills. Apparently, it was because of the fact that our entire lives were packed in the car on the way here. The entire trunk was full, as was the entire front of the car, save for my seat, Raena's, and Michael's. Today, with no load, the trip was a BREEZE. I was immediately in a better mood because now I knew that I could go as often as I like, with respect to the cost of gas. Secondly, Jeremy told me that he lives by himself and he's cool with me crashing over at his crib sometime. He's currently working on the new prequel to "The Da Vinci Code" and he said if I come on a Friday after he gets off work, maybe he can introduce me to some people in the biz. It's nothing special, but I GREATLY appreciate the gesture and it was wonderful just to hear. I'm COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY JEALOUS of him. Third, I got a free ticket to see Bill Maher!!!!!!!!!!!! I've always wanted to see him live. Now, on Thursday, I can go to Hollywood and see him rehearse for his show!!

Surprisingly, the thing that really sent the day through the atmosphere was the time we spent at Raena's aunt's house. She lives about 6 miles from Hollywood Blvd, so it was no big deal to go visit. Normally, I HATE being around other people's family. I ESPECIALLY hate it the very first time when I don't know them. Her aunt and cousin were sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo nice. I was so comfortable there, they were so cool. We were there for 4 hrs, and I didn't look at my watch once. I can't stress how unusual that is for me. I'm EXTREMELY anti-social, but I really enjoyed myself. We all talked, her aunt cooked, Jr seemed to love them. Everything went perfectly. To top it all off, her aunt likes Michael so much (and he likes her) that she said she'd try to make sure she was available to watch him so I could go see Bill Maher. That's an amazing gesture to make for someone you just met. But we were all so comfortable with one another, and I'm very thankful for that.

Overall, today was just a wonderful day. I have hope again. I can go to LA. I can visit Jeremy. I can go to a club in HOLLYWOOD of all places! I can have fun. I can meet people in the movie biz (possibly). Whenever I want, I can go spend time in a place that I've always dreamed of being. I can be around people who are living the life I want to live, and hopefully that will motivate me. I'm going to try to go see The Tonight Show, The Price Is Right, Real Time with Bill Maher, and any other show that comes to mind. I'm going to try to do it up as much as I can. Then, to top it all off, I feel as if I have more family out here. I just met Raena's aunt, but she's such a genuinely kind and enjoyable person that I'd happily welcome her into my life. I really enjoy meeting cool people. So as you all know, I really needed today. Hopefully now I can drag my heart of the mud and, as Renaldo recommended, focus on my hope for the future. Peep the pics, and I'll be sure to keep you all updated with all that is going on with me out here, because I know some of you have to be worried about my mental state. lol